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Dear Roy ,

What's your technique? What is Slam's Technique? How come I don't know or have these techniques? I don't want to know Bren's Technique and I've known Dave's for years. I don't know if I could handle Scott's, and Jeff's technique is.... well it looks technical.

Why doesn't byerun get a new hat?

How come you don't play in Perham or Otter Tail? How Come you don't play "American Girl" by Tom Petty? you should.

I plan to begin stalking you all soon.... at least an endless barrage of server-choking nuisance email, ok? Peabody rocks. al b. tross

Dear al b. tross,

I don't know that I have a technique. I find that beer helps me to believe I have a technique. I think alcohol is the secret to everyone's technique. The brand and quality of the alcohol is directly related to the quality and technicality of the technique.
I have given Byerun a new hat. I don't know why it has not landed on his head. I'm not sure where else he would wear it.
Perham and Otter Tail are both too far away for Henry, our 87 year old bus driver, to drive. Besides, his night vision isn't what it used to be.
The band used to play "American Girl" but since they've all forgotten it, they don't play it anymore.

Can't wait for the server-choking nuisance email,

Roy

Dear Roy,
Why is it that the “Suck” light goes off on the sound board every time Jeff has lead vocal?  He’s not THAT bad, is he, or has Mikey not fixed that button yet?
Yours truly,
Brenty

 

 

Brent,


We've had the "suck" light removed from all sound boards we use.  Actually, it was on constantly and was blinding Byerun.  If we run into a place where the "suck" light has not been removed, we just duct tape over it.  We need to save Byerun's eyes!  I'm sorry, I don't know who Mikey is.  We're fresh out of Mikeys over here in Peabody land.


Respectively, 

Roy

 

Dear Roy,
 
Why doesn’t anyone ask you anything anymore?
Is it because everyone knows everything and no one’s ever wrong? (until later)
 

Regards,
 
N. Peart


Dear Mr. Peart,

People still write sometimes but I've been really busy with my secret experiments to answer.  
After my latest explosion, the doc said I could sit up for a few hours a day to type so here I am.  I'll be ok, probably.  
I do believe that everyone knows everything and no one is ever wrong.  EVER!

Thank you, 
Roy

Roy,

Can you tell me the name of the band that John Moore (former AHB rhythm guitarist) plays in now?

Thanks!

Dear Thanks,

The last time I talked to John he told me the name of the band he was in but I don't remember what is was. Sorry. I know they played with "DawgWild" a few times so maybe you can find out through their website. Sorry I couldn't be of more assistance. Come out and see us sometime!

Take care,

Roy

Why does rap still exist?

Love, Bec

Dear Bec,

That's a very difficult question. I thought after "Wild Thing", "Funky Cold Medina" and "Bust a Move", all the good rap songs were recorded. Apparently I was mistaken. Ok, maybe "I like Big Butts" is ok, but that's about it. I know a lot of the bands are playing "Word Up" but that's actually a disco song. Obviously someone is buying the c.d.'s or they wouldn't keep making them. To each his own I say. There many different music types so there is something for everyone to enjoy. Don't diss my musical tastes and I won't diss yours!

Thanks for writing,

Roy
(Now playing..."My Humps" by Black Eyed Peas)


Dear Roy,

Hi, i had talked to Jeff last fri. at Dimonds about opening for you 
guys,  he had said that we could probly work somthing out.  We are 16 
years old and looking for someone to help us out. Our bands name is 
"Spur 7", we have a myspace and pure volume so check us out and tell 
us what you think.

Thanks for your time, Ryan(bass)


Dear Ryan,

I'm not sure what your question is.  As far as opening for Peabody, it's fine with me.  Most places we play book the band  to play three, one-hour sets for a certain price.  Having an opener is another matter.  You guys being 16 doesn't help.  Which reminds me, how did you get into Diamonds?  Anyway, you'd have to talk to Slam and see what he thinks.  He's the brains of the operation (which should tell 
you something!).  Just kidding Slam!  I'm just the light guy man!

Thanks for writing,

Roy

[Notes from Slam ]
a)    Please...use Spell check
b)    IF we play Diamond's, AND it's OK with the "powers to be" at the Bar...sure...WTF would we care? (you realize that YOU won't be paid, right? LOL)
3)    Why did you take "Billy thinks we suck" (or was it "Billy thinks this song sucks"?) off of your Myspace Account ?
Z)    hey...I like the new songs

Roy,

The light-show at Al's was really great! Can you tell me how much effort it is to put something like that together? I would like to get a light-show like that for my band. We currently only play in my basement but I think we need the light to perfect our show so we can rock like peabody! Oh yea - what like of power will I need in my basement for the light-show?

Signed,

"Still workin' on the show" Mike.

Dear "still workin' on the show" MIke,

Thank you for the nice complement on the light show. It's nice to be appreciated. I worked on that particular show for most of the day. It's a lot of cabling and deciding how you want the show to look and colors and focusing and programming the light board and on and on and on. Basically, a great show takes a lot of effort. As for your basement band, you really don't need a light show for that situation but if you really want one, I would suggest a combo dj unit to start with. A light show like Grampa Al's, which belongs to Rob Krueger of Gemini fame, is expensive. The moving lights alone are $600.00 or more and that's for a used one! Just one! The show requires 220 power, dimmers, cables, gels (colors), gel frames, bulbs, control cables and a light control console. If you REALLY want to go through all this, check ebay or your local music store for more help. Or, go out and see Gemini and ask Rob to hook you up. He always has stuff to sell...at the right price!

Thanks for the question and good luck!

Roy

Hello

We have an annual fall fest every year. This all started when we got married in our backyard. We had such a wonderful time with the planning and the party was great! So we decided to have an annual fall fest, in September, this will be our 7th year. We sometimes roast a pig or just due burgers on the grill. We rent a moon walk for the smaller kids and have a BINGO tent, volleyball, horseshoes and bon fire for everyone. We also do a raffle the first break the band takes. We usually have around 160 people. (Family and Friends).

So we are always keeping ours eyes open for a band. We would be interested in knowing your fee. This would be for a Saturday evening, usually 6pm-10pm for the band. We provide a flat bed trailer for the stage and also have a hay wagon for the drummer if needed. We also put a canopy over this.

We saw your band at POV's in Andover, we're not far from there. Thanks Sue

Dear Sue,

Thank you for your interest in the band. As far as booking goes, there is a link on the website for booking info. There are a few things to consider in an outdoor show situation. Weather, power and lights are just a few. If you would like the whole show, including lights, we would require 220 power and an electrician. If it's an early show, we still need enough power to run the PA and all the band gear. Are there neighbors who would object to the noise? Is there a city noise ordinance? Police have a tendency to show up at private parties when a band is involved. You need to make sure you have all the bases covered. I understand you've been doing this for awhile so I'm sure you know all these things. Basically, check out the booking link on the website and go from there. We will be at Pov's on Saturday the 25th of February so stop in and say hi!

Thanks for the question,

Roy

 

Dear Roy,
I have heard that Mister Peabody has the be all, end all rock show. High energy, bright lights and a sound that will peel your face off. It sounds much like what would happen if our sun would blow up, hence the question: I'm sure with all your intellect you already know that if the sun were to blow up, it would take roughly eight minutes until the atmosphere would peeled off the planet, our blood would boil and we would become small shards of charcoal. If Mister Peabody were to be on stage knowing, through your psychic abilities, that they only had eight minutes to play, what would their song selection be?

Sincerely, Nemesis

Dear Nemesis,

I have pondered your question. I have puzzled and puzzed until my puzzler was sore. After days and days of mind bending struggle, I have decided I don't like science.
Thank you for your question,

Roy ((ED. NOTE - Probably Something Roy would enjoy...Like "Little Miss")

Roy,

What's the Deal with the "New Page 1" link on the left hand side of the Ask Roy Page?
Is the guy running the Website an idiot?

Signed
-the guy running the website


Dear "the guy running the website,
Do you mean these questions are on a website? Who would want to read this crap?

Roy

Roy,
I was just at PrimeTime in Burnsville and I noticed that they do not have a drum riser. I also noticed that Mr. Peabody will be playing there this Saturday. I am concerned that your rockin’ light show might suck if the drummer isn’t on a drum riser. Do you yourself have any concerns about your light show considering the lack of a drum riser? Can the Healy or the Hayseed truck drop off a riser so you can still provide the highest quality of rock show lighting?
Regards,

Jamie P.

Dear Jamie P.,

Thank you for your question. I don't have any concerns about the quality of my light show this Saturday. I try to do my best at each show and deal with every stage as best I can. The lack of a drum riser does worry me a little bit but I plan to use so much fog that you won't be able to see the band anyway so it shouldn't matter. I don't think either of the afore mentioned bands can afford to let us use their riser. I have the utmost confidence that Bren can rock without a riser. Hey, that kind of sounds like some sort of benefit show, "Rock without a Riser." Maybe even a CD title! If all else fails, have a few more drinks at the show and everything will seem better!

Roy,

I'm looking for an un-biased, educated opinion....Evolution or Intelligent Design?
Signed
A. Skeptic

PS..what is your costume for Halloween?

Dear A. Skeptic,

This question has plagued humans and aliens alike for at least a couple of years. I don't want to cause an international incident or anger any religious groups so I will just give my own personal opinion. I KNOW there is a GOD and he created everything and anyone who says otherwise can kiss my a**!...........Excuse me, was that my loud voice? I believe in God. Enough said.

My costume for halloween is going to be a guy on the couch hoping the doorbell doesn't ring! I have nothing against halloween, I loved it when I was a kid, but I look stupid enough on a daily basis. I don't need to try harder on halloween. All you other kids, have fun and eat all the candy you can. Yes, you will get a stomach ache but believe me, it's worth it!

 

Dear Roy,

Why Mister Peabody?
I mean, don’t they suck? 
Concerned


Dear Concerned,

 Dear Concerned,
I am a bit confused by your question. It can be interpreted many ways. Let me try to answer it in the number of ways I feel it can be asked.

Why does Mr. Peabody exist? Well, the cities music scene sucks right now. It's difficult to find a band within 50 miles of the Twin Cities that has not either been around forever and they bore the pants off you or they are really young and their greatest talent is getting really drunk and playing like crap! Mr. Peabody has re-formed to give some relief to the music loving population of the twin cities. Not too old, not too young, great musicians, great music and they don't suck! (And the light guy ROOOOCCKKKKSSS!) To answer the second part of your question, they really don't suck. It's a joke son!

Why the name Mr. Peabody? Simply put, because Austin Healy and The Killer Hayseeds were already taken.

Why do I work for Mr. Peabody? Because they were silly enough to ask. It's too late to back out now!

Why should you see Mr. Peabody? Because we all need the extra income!

Thank you for writing. I hope this eases your mind.

Roy
From Doug 4/24/01
Roy, I have this baffling problem with people mistaking me for a lighting guy.....am I wearing too many laminates? or do I look like I`m baked...? thank you , Doug


(ED. NOTE - laminates are passes usually worn around the neck required for restricted access areas of a venue, many lighting guys are often baked, and faders control volume levels on a sound console)
Roy Says:
Dear Doug, It's funny that you're being mistaken for a lighting guy because I'm often mistaken for a sound guy. People come up to me and want me to turn it down. I guess they might just as well ask me because we all know that once faders are up, they can only go up further. Faders can't be pulled down until the sound board is allowed to cool after the show is over. Maybe you should try looking a little busier behind the sound board. Everyone knows sound guys work harder than light guys so maybe that would help. Also, make sure you look disinterested in what's going on up on stage. Maybe try putting your beer on the effects rack. No one is allowed to put a drink on the rack but the sound guy! If none of these things help, being mistaken for a light guy isn't so bad. It could be worse, you could be mistaken for a bass player! Rock on brother!


From Andy 4/9/01
Dear Roy,
Convince me why I should become a Buccaneer fan, They have great fun, good weather mostly, a couple of player really come out of the line up ready to explode could put this teem on top
Andy


Roy says:
Deary Andy, as far as I'm concerned, you can be a fan of any TEAM you want to. I'm a big fan of beer and pizza. Oh yea, and NASCAR. I do have one suggestion for you, don't drink and type.


From Stuck Inside 4/9/01
hello Roy,
tell me if you would please,is it possible that im really a lesbian trapped in a mans body? i really need to find out!!!!!!!!!!!!! Any advice you could give me would be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks,!! stuck inside .


Roy Says:
Dear Stuck inside, I think I suffer from the same affliction. Ain't it great?


From Sweetie 4/9/01
Hi Roy!
First of all I would like to know when the hell we are going to get some lasting sunshine in Minnesota? I know you are a busy guy, but if you have a copy of the Farmers Almanac laying around maybe you could check it out? Here's my real dilemma.....I want to get out of here for a few days and I'm not sure where to go? I was thinking Vegas because I can lay by the pool and get some rays, there's plenty of nightlife, and I may even win a few $$$$$. Any ideas? Let me know what you think. Thanks... Sweetie


Roy Says:
Dear Sweetie, first of all, I feel VERY uncomfortable typing "Sweetie" to someone I don't know. If you write again, try using a different name like honeybunch. Sorry, I don't know much about the weather. Unfortunately, neither do the weather people, so I couldn't tell you when the sun will shine on a more frequent basis. Hopefully it will be soon. I need some too. As far as a vacation spot, I've never been to Vegas but I heard it's cool. I've flown over it a couple times on my way to L.A. and all I can say for sure is, they have a lot of lights. Wherever you go, I suggest heading south until it gets above 70 degrees. Have fun!

From Curious 3/6/01
Dear Roy,
After viewing the picture of you with the two "ladies", I'm surprised your still single. Why is this?

Sincerely,
Curious in California

Roy Says:
Dear Curious, For one thing, the two ladies in the picture are created through the magic of Photoshop so I have never seen them. Sorry if that disappoints anyone. As for the fact that I'm still single, it's a question that's baffled many throughout the years. It could be I'm shy, could be I just haven't met the right girl yet, it could be that I'm destined to live out my remaining years as a grumpy old bachelor. I'm well on my way! Any girls that want to help me with my problem are welcome. Maybe this sounds like a shameless attempt at getting a date through this medium. That's because it is. What can I say, I'm shameless.

From Junior 3/6/01
Dear Roy
Is it easier to get chicks as a lighting guy or a guitar tech? Guitar techs certainly look cooler because they have a guitar on and look like they might know how to play. How / why did you get into lighting?

Junior

Roy Says:
Dear Junior, I hope you don't mind if I brag on you a little bit. Your e-mail address won't show up here so you will remain anonymous. Let me just say it's an honor to get a letter from the lighting director of "Limp Bizkit". I understand from our mutual friend that you're on a little break before heading back on tour. Come out and see the guy who has your old job if you have a chance. It would be great to see you again. On to the question. You know as well as I do it's not easy to meet women if you're not on stage. If you do meet them, they want to know where the guitar player is. You get called our favorite word "roadie" a lot. Just for everyone's information, "crew guy", "light guy", "sound guy", or better yet "light tech" or "sound tech" will get a much better response to any question asked of a member of any bands crew. We work very hard and are very good at what we do and I want to say thanks to the 'Healy guys for being supportive and appreciative. Why did I get into lighting? Well, I really love the creativity lighting allows and it's great to get out from along side the stage. Most people actually know I belong with the band now. Plus, I don't have to spend my whole break tuning nine guitars! I get to try new stuff all the time and I really enjoy that. To make a long answer short it's not easy meeting the right girl no matter what you do. You just have to do what you enjoy and hope for the best.
Thanks Junior. Keep rockin' buddy!

From Bass Fisher 2/2/01
Dear Roy,

I would like to know if Austin Healy will be playing at the Commander Bar in Breezy Point on a Friday or Sat. night this Spring/Summer??? Do you have a Classic Car? I have a 71 Cutlass.
Bass Fisher


Roy Says:
Dear Bass Fisher, I'm not in the scheduling department of our little organization but we're up there every couple months or so. Keep an eye on the schedule and I'm sure there will be a few dates over the summer. Yes, I have a classic car. It's a '68 Buick Riviera. I've been doing a lot of work to it over the last 3 years but this year I'm going to try and leave it alone so I can drive it. It's kind of a bigger car, not exactly a "chick getter" but it's got a 430 motor in it ( that's over 7 liters in modern measure) so it goes really fast! I never drive over the speed limit though.......RIGHT!) It's February already so spring is right around the corner! I hope the gas prices go down so I can afford to fill the tank. That four barrel carb is very thirsty. Stop and say hi the next time you come out. Maybe you could bring your car out sometime, I'd like to check it out! Thanks for writing, Roy.

From: Keep Rockin' 1/2/01
Roy,
Why is that Kenny is the one to be killed all the time on South Park? He's a cool kid, despite the fact that you can never understand what he is saying. Why not kill Cartman? He is so obnoxious all the time. It would be a relief to see his fat a** splattered all over the place.
Keep Rockin'


Roy Says:
Dear "Keep Rockin'," I don't know why Kenny is the one being killed all the time on South Park. He's just lucky I guess. It's one of those "someone has to do it" things. Maybe it's because you don't become attached to him because you can't understand him. I wouldn't want Cartman to die because I'm kind of partial to the little fella. I think there's a little Cartman in all of us. He says the things we would like to say sometimes. "Screw you guys, I'm
going home!" Roy


From: Shawn 1/2/01
Hi Roy, What is the firing order of a big block chevrolet engine? What is
the proper way to store a classic car? 
Shawn


Roy Says:
Shawn, I'm not sure the firing order of a big block Chevy engine but it's
usually cast on the block itself. If not, you should be able to find out at
your local auto parts store as long as the person helping you is old enough
to know what a big block is and has maybe even turned the screws on a
carburetor! Storing a classic is something I know a little about. Inside
is best. Make sure the building is free of mice and other rodents. Check
all the fluids and make sure the antifreeze is good to 40 below. Put it up
on blocks to take the pressure off the tires. Disconnect the battery and
store it inside your house if you can. It'll prolong battery life. Same
rules apply if you store it outside. You might want to put a car cover on
it also. Make sure you run it awhile before shutting it down for the
winter. That will make sure the seals are all lubed the the antifreeze has
circulated through the engine. That's about all I can think of. I'll race
you next summer! Roy


From "Trying to be nice" 1/2/01
Roy,
I have a friend who tends to make me feel bad about things that go really
good for me. She also makes sure that anything bad, that I have had, she has
either had it happen to her and it was worse, or she tries to top it. I
don't know what to do anymore, I feel like she wants to be me. What is a
poor girl to do?
"Trying to be nice"


Roy Says:
Dear "trying to be nice," I've had friends like that and maybe I've even been guilty of it myself. Sometimes when someone is telling you a story it reminds you of one of your own and you're so anxious to tell it that you forget about their story. My best friend has a habit of interrupting me when I'm trying to tell her something important or sharing personal problem. I finally just told her about it and now she's much better at listening. She still does it sometimes but I just remind her and then she listens. I'm not sure if you and your friend are close enough to to be that honest with each other but if you are, just tell her how you feel. A real friend should be happy for you when you're happy and supportive when you're sad. If she makes you feel bad when you're happy and worse when bad things happen, that's not a great friendship. Friends make mistakes and they sometimes hurt each other but a real friendship can endure those bad times and the good far outweigh the bad. Talk to her and tell her how you feel. If that doesn't help, find a new friend. Good luck, Roy


From: "Sherrie" 11/13/00
Roy,
I have been in a relationship with this guy for five years and engaged to him for four and a half of those years. We are still not married and we don't seem in love anymore, it is the same routine every day. We don't touch unless by accident and I feel like I am not getting what I need. I do love him but, he says there is nothing wrong or does not talk at all. What is your advice.


Roy Says:
Sherrie, I think you need to sit down and ask yourself some hard questions. What do you want from this relationship? Since you two are engaged, I assume you want to be married. A four and half year engagement is a very long time, too long. It's taking this long for a reason and only he knows what that is. If he won't talk your problems over with you, there's big trouble. Being a guy, I know communication isn't one of our strong points, but in a relationship it's vital. You have to find some way to make him tell you how he feels. And you need to examine how you feel. Sometimes love fades away forever and sometimes it just goes on a little vacation and comes back again. I've learned what's meant to be will happen no matter what and what's not meant to be can't be forced to happen. It all boils down to deciding what you want in your life and finding it. If he's not going the same direction you are, find someone who is. I know it looks easy on e-mail but I also know how hard it is. I've been on both sides of this story and I know how difficult it is. I'm still waiting for "miss right" and I'm not settling for anything less. True love is well worth the wait. Listen to your heart and your head and if you end up alone that's ok. Spend some time discovering yourself and realize the person you're looking for is looking for you too! A little tip I'd like to give all the wonderful ladies looking for a good guy: Don't be afraid to approach him! If you see a guy you'd like to meet, GO TALK TO HIM! You girls are very intimidating so give us a break and make the first move once in awhile. You have a choice of who to talk to so don't wait for him to pick you. What if he doesn't? I'm a pretty shy guy so I know I speak for all the shy guys when I say "give us a little help here". Rest assured, any girl that comes and talks to me will have my full cooperation. End of lecture. Thanks for writing and let me know how it comes out. Best wishes.

FROM: Purple Helmet
Do you think Green Bay should have ever been awarded a NFL franchise?
Me too!
Do you think Green Bay is a waste of space on the map?
Me too!
What do you think of Anna Kornakova?
Me too!


Roy Says:
Dear Purple Helmet, Yes I think Green Bay should have been awarded a
football franchise because the Vikings need a team to beat up on. And no,
I don't think Green Bay is a waste of space on the map because it represents
a place I don't want to be. I can't tell you what I think of Anna Kornakova
because I don't know her personally but I think every normal male feels the
same way about her body. She's pretty!!! Thanks for writing. Go Vikes!

FROM: Satan
Dear Roy,
I hate everybody. I don't waste any time, I just start hating them right away.
Does that make me a bad person?
See you in hell.
Satan
Roy Says:
Dear Satan, Did you know that hate is a form of love? The opposite of
love is not hate it's indifference. So, if you hate everybody, you really
care about them. That makes you a people person and that's a good thing.
So spread the hate!

 

Last modified: May 09, 2010